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Captioning made possible
By mgm home entertainment
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Oliver: ♪ green acres
Is the place to be ♪
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♪ farm livin' is
The life for me ♪
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♪ land spreadin'
Out so far and wide ♪
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♪ keep manhattan, just
Give me that countryside ♪
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Lisa: ♪ new york ♪
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♪ is where I'd rather stay ♪
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♪ I get allergic ♪
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♪ smelling hay ♪
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♪ I just adore a
Penthouse view ♪
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♪ darling, I love you ♪
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♪ but give me park avenue ♪
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♪ the chores ♪
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♪ the stores ♪
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♪ fresh air ♪
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♪ times square ♪
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♪ you are my wife ♪
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♪ good-bye, city life ♪
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Both: ♪ green acres,
We are there ♪
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Howdy mrs. Douglas.
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Doggone, you look as pretty
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As a $350 judgment
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Against your husband.
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Thank you. Mr. Haney...
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You got the money with you
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In that suitcase?
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No, I haven't.
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Why not?
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Because you're not
Gonna win the case.
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Excuse me.
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Where are you going?
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With you.
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Oh, no. You sit over there.
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Well, I want to sit with you.
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That's the attorney's table.
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I am the attorney's wife.
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You're a witness.
You sit over there.
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Well, I can see better up here.
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No.
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00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:04,956
Well, mr. Haney's
Sitting up here.
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Mr. Haney's
Involved in the case.
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He's suing me.
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I hope he wins.
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Lisa.
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Have you met my
High-priced lawyer?
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Oh, no, I haven't.
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This here is diller fangworth.
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How do you do? Howdy.
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Mr. Douglas, who's
Representing you?
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I'm representing myself.
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He's an a-ttorney.
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He is? How come I never saw you
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In the saloon across the street?
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The saloon?
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All the real lawyers
Hang out there.
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Well, I'm a real lawyer.
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Where'd you go to law school?
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Harvard.
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You ever graduate?
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Of course I graduated.
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Then why don't you
Hang out at the saloon
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Across the street?
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Mr. Haney: mr. Douglas...
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This is your last chance
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To settle out of court.
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No, thank you.
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What's he doing?
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Warmin' up.
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Ain't that a great imitation
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Of spencer tracy?
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Spencer...
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The judge's fav-o-rite actor.
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Darling, why are you
Taking your coat off?
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Don't you see what he's doing?
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He's trying to make
Me look like a city dude.
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Well, you are.
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Hear ye, hear ye.
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The pixley superior
Municipal court
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Is now in session.
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Judge clemens presiding.
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All rise for the judge.
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00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:47,670
What's the first case, henry?
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00:03:47,694 --> 00:03:49,193
haney vs. Douglas.
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00:03:49,262 --> 00:03:51,128
Ahem. Plaintiff ready?
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Ready, your honor.
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Judge: the defendant ready?
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Ready, your honor.
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00:03:55,134 --> 00:03:56,067
Who are you?
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00:03:56,135 --> 00:03:57,335
Uh, I'm the defendant...
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00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:58,470
Oliver wendell douglas.
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00:03:58,538 --> 00:04:00,182
Are you represented by council?
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00:04:00,206 --> 00:04:01,305
Uh, no, sir.
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00:04:01,375 --> 00:04:03,341
If you can't afford an attorney,
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00:04:03,410 --> 00:04:05,777
The court will be
Glad to appoint one.
95
00:04:05,846 --> 00:04:07,779
Uh, no, your honor. I
Don't need an attorney.
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00:04:07,848 --> 00:04:09,046
I am an attorney.
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00:04:09,115 --> 00:04:10,248
You are?
98
00:04:10,316 --> 00:04:11,416
Yes, sir.
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00:04:11,485 --> 00:04:13,229
How come I never saw you
100
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,453
Across the street in the saloon?
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00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:18,668
You're acting in
Your own behalf?
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00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:19,758
I am, sir.
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00:04:19,826 --> 00:04:22,727
Then put on your coat!
This is a court of law.
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Mr. Fangworth
Doesn't have his on.
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Diller, put your coat on.
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00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:29,211
But, your honor...
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I've seen your imitation
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Of spencer tracy.
109
00:04:34,140 --> 00:04:36,941
Now, let me see if I
Understand this correctly.
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Uh, mr. Haney,
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You're suing
Mr. Douglas for $350
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For services which
You claim you rendered
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And he claims you did not.
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00:04:47,153 --> 00:04:48,853
I rendered 'em.
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00:04:48,922 --> 00:04:50,087
No, he didn't.
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Order!
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00:04:51,357 --> 00:04:53,436
Gentlemen, there's an
Established procedure
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For trying a case.
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00:04:54,928 --> 00:04:57,495
Haven't you ever
Seen perry mason?
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00:04:57,564 --> 00:04:59,096
Mr. Fangworth,
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Would you present
Your opening statement?
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00:05:01,167 --> 00:05:02,600
Yes, your honor.
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As you know, for
A period of 92 days,
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There was no rain in
The hooterville valley.
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00:05:15,682 --> 00:05:17,549
My client mr. Haney,
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Being aware of
The great hardship
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This drought was working
On the hooterville farmers,
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Offered to make it rain
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Out of the goodness
Of his heart for $350.
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00:05:30,797 --> 00:05:33,297
Mr. Douglas contracted
With mr. Haney
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For said rain,
132
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Which was delivered in
The recent cloudbursts,
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00:05:37,236 --> 00:05:38,870
Which saved the crops.
134
00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:41,205
But when mr. Haney
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00:05:41,274 --> 00:05:43,741
Presented his bill
For his services,
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Mr. Douglas refused payment,
137
00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:49,881
Saying that mr. Haney
Did not induce the rain.
138
00:05:49,950 --> 00:05:53,351
Now, we intend to
Prove that he did.
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I thank you.
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00:05:57,457 --> 00:05:58,823
Mr. Douglas.
141
00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:01,392
Your honor...
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00:06:01,461 --> 00:06:02,727
Your honor,
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00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:04,395
Uh, I will not deny
144
00:06:04,464 --> 00:06:06,898
That I made a contract
With mr. Haney.
145
00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:09,501
However, I'll prove
That it was not mr. Haney
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00:06:09,569 --> 00:06:12,003
Who made it rain,
But my wife lisa.
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Uh, that's me, your honor.
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You see, my husband...
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Madam, would you
Mind being seated?
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00:06:17,176 --> 00:06:18,943
I talk better standing up.
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00:06:20,113 --> 00:06:21,858
Lisa, you'll get a chance
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To tell your story when
I call you as a witness.
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Well, I thought
If I told it now,
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It would save some time,
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So the judge could
Go across the street
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To the saloon with his friends.
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The court appreciates
Your concern.
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00:06:34,794 --> 00:06:37,729
Call your first witness, diller.
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00:06:37,797 --> 00:06:40,131
Yes, sir, that's right. I'm
Mr. Douglas' hired hand.
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00:06:40,199 --> 00:06:41,699
I've worked for him for...
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00:06:41,768 --> 00:06:43,312
Would you mind
Removing your hat?
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00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:44,435
It goes with the outfit!
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Take it off!
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00:06:46,105 --> 00:06:47,539
Yes, sir.
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Now, eb, I want you...
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Does my hair look all right?
167
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It looks fine, fine.
168
00:06:52,612 --> 00:06:54,445
I want you to tell the court
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In your own words
Exactly what happened
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00:06:56,983 --> 00:06:58,616
A month ago today.
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00:06:58,685 --> 00:07:00,018
Let me see.
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00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:02,319
That was the 86th
Day with no rain.
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Everything was pretty dry,
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And the vultures
Were circlin' overhead.
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I wonder which one
Of us they're after.
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00:07:11,565 --> 00:07:12,764
Oh, they're not...
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00:07:12,832 --> 00:07:15,232
Probably you. You got
More meat on your bones.
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00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:17,179
Eb, how do you know
They're vultures?
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00:07:17,203 --> 00:07:20,304
Care to lie down and
See what happens?
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I think that's the same squadron
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That was here for
The 1960 drought.
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Yeah, I recognize that one!
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00:07:25,845 --> 00:07:27,979
That's charlie.
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00:07:28,048 --> 00:07:30,114
Hey, he grew a new beak.
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00:07:30,183 --> 00:07:32,483
He broke his other
One peckin' at my uncle.
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00:07:32,552 --> 00:07:35,920
Eb, it's too hot for
These silly jokes.
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00:07:35,989 --> 00:07:37,421
Look at this corn.
188
00:07:37,490 --> 00:07:39,669
Isn't there anything
We can do to save it?
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00:07:39,693 --> 00:07:41,325
How about gettin'
Down on our knees
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00:07:41,394 --> 00:07:43,494
And facin' the
Jolly green giant?
191
00:07:43,563 --> 00:07:45,763
Eb, will you...
192
00:07:45,832 --> 00:07:47,531
Well, sir, when I
Picked myself up...
193
00:07:47,601 --> 00:07:49,133
Mr. Douglas hit you?
194
00:07:49,202 --> 00:07:50,935
No, sir. I made the mistake
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00:07:51,004 --> 00:07:52,369
Of turnin' my back on charlie,
196
00:07:52,438 --> 00:07:54,806
And he swooped down
And knocked me flat.
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You just tell us what happened
198
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After mr. Douglas'
Trained vulture
199
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Knocked you down.
200
00:08:01,014 --> 00:08:02,546
I object, your honor.
201
00:08:02,616 --> 00:08:04,916
The council for the
Plaintiff has no right to imply
202
00:08:04,985 --> 00:08:06,896
That I had any connection
With any vulture.
203
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:08,898
We're gonna get
To that, your honor.
204
00:08:08,922 --> 00:08:11,155
What do you intend to do,
Bring the vulture into court
205
00:08:11,224 --> 00:08:12,323
And question him?
206
00:08:12,391 --> 00:08:14,269
Was you listenin'
At our office door?
207
00:08:14,293 --> 00:08:18,062
I don't eve know
Where your office is.
208
00:08:18,131 --> 00:08:19,964
Order. Objection sustained.
209
00:08:20,033 --> 00:08:21,410
Go on with your questioning.
210
00:08:21,434 --> 00:08:24,335
What happened after you came in
211
00:08:24,404 --> 00:08:25,604
From the field?
212
00:08:25,672 --> 00:08:26,838
Do I have to tell him?
213
00:08:26,907 --> 00:08:27,907
Yes.
214
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:29,540
It ain't gonna make
You look good.
215
00:08:29,610 --> 00:08:31,187
Young man, answer the question.
216
00:08:31,211 --> 00:08:33,511
Will you help me find
Another job, judge?
217
00:08:33,580 --> 00:08:37,381
Would you like 30 days
On the county work farm?
218
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:38,450
No, sir.
219
00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:40,151
When we came in from the field,
220
00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:42,621
Mrs. Douglas was
Talkin' to rudolph.
221
00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:44,255
Good morning, rudolph.
222
00:08:45,792 --> 00:08:48,326
Aww, you look tired.
223
00:08:48,394 --> 00:08:50,461
Didn't you sleep
Well last night?
224
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,597
Well, neither did
I. It was too hot.
225
00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:53,865
Oliver: lisa?
226
00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:57,836
Out here, darling!
That's my husband.
227
00:08:57,904 --> 00:08:59,237
Who are you talking to?
228
00:08:59,305 --> 00:09:00,538
To rudolph.
229
00:09:00,607 --> 00:09:02,774
Rudolph? Mm-hmm. Him.
230
00:09:05,445 --> 00:09:06,778
He's a sunflow...
231
00:09:06,847 --> 00:09:08,980
Uh, it's a sunflower.
232
00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:10,281
I know it.
233
00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:12,917
You talk to him... Uh, it?
234
00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:14,519
Well, of course I do.
235
00:09:14,587 --> 00:09:16,755
Otherwise, he thinks I'm a snob.
236
00:09:16,823 --> 00:09:19,457
Uh, lisa, come on.
You get inside here.
237
00:09:19,526 --> 00:09:21,126
I think the heat's got you.
238
00:09:21,194 --> 00:09:22,326
Oh, no, darling.
239
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,707
I talked to rudolph
Before the heat got me.
240
00:09:24,731 --> 00:09:25,830
What are you doing?
241
00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:27,143
Giving him his breakfast.
242
00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:28,599
Lisa, that's water!
243
00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:30,613
Well, that's the
Only thing he eats.
244
00:09:30,637 --> 00:09:32,937
You're wasting water
On a stupid sunflower?
245
00:09:33,006 --> 00:09:34,884
Well, that's a nice thing to say
246
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,908
After he went to all the trouble
247
00:09:36,977 --> 00:09:38,143
To grow out here.
248
00:09:38,211 --> 00:09:39,610
I didn't ask rudolph to gr...
249
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:42,647
Or, him to grow...
it to grow out here!
250
00:09:42,716 --> 00:09:44,248
Lisa, if you want
To water something,
251
00:09:44,317 --> 00:09:46,785
I've got acres of corn
Out there crying for water.
252
00:09:46,853 --> 00:09:48,564
Well, why don't you
Go and water them?
253
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:49,721
There's no water.
254
00:09:49,790 --> 00:09:51,823
We haven't had rain for 86 days.
255
00:09:51,892 --> 00:09:54,059
If you let me water
Rudolph every day,
256
00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:56,327
We can have all
The rain we want.
257
00:09:56,396 --> 00:09:57,428
What?
258
00:09:57,497 --> 00:09:59,408
There is a story in
The old country...
259
00:09:59,432 --> 00:10:02,266
If a sunflower grows
Outside your back door,
260
00:10:02,335 --> 00:10:04,147
And you water him every day,
261
00:10:04,171 --> 00:10:05,782
You can ask him one favor,
262
00:10:05,806 --> 00:10:07,183
And he has to grant it.
263
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:09,418
Otherwise, he's out
Of the sunflowers.
264
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:11,442
Lisa, you go on in the house.
265
00:10:11,511 --> 00:10:13,712
Here, give me
That. Put a hat on.
266
00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:15,814
Something to keep the heat off.
267
00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:19,584
Silly stories. Where does she...
268
00:10:23,890 --> 00:10:25,824
Rudolph, uh...
269
00:10:30,663 --> 00:10:32,864
There he was, talking
To this sunflower,
270
00:10:32,933 --> 00:10:34,643
Pleadin' with him
To make it rain.
271
00:10:34,667 --> 00:10:36,334
Pleading with a sunflower?
272
00:10:36,402 --> 00:10:38,014
Yes, sir. I told you
273
00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:39,816
It wasn't gonna
Make you look good.
274
00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:41,706
Your honor, I
Object. I fail to see
275
00:10:41,775 --> 00:10:43,552
What this testimony
Has to do with the case.
276
00:10:43,576 --> 00:10:46,410
Your honor, I'm
Just trying to show
277
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:49,214
That at the time my
Client made it rain,
278
00:10:49,282 --> 00:10:52,183
Mr. Douglas was in no
Fit condition to judge
279
00:10:52,252 --> 00:10:54,552
Whether my client
Made it rain or not.
280
00:10:54,621 --> 00:10:56,587
To put it in legal terms,
281
00:10:56,656 --> 00:11:00,992
He was non compos in his mentis.
282
00:11:01,061 --> 00:11:04,629
The compos of my
Mentis is not on trial.
283
00:11:04,697 --> 00:11:07,899
I mean, whether or
Not I'm compos is, uh...
284
00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:09,333
It's irrelevant!
285
00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:11,936
I move that I be stricken
From the record.
286
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:15,039
No, the remarks, that is... Of.
287
00:11:17,577 --> 00:11:20,344
Mr. Douglas, if you'd like
Me to declare a recess...
288
00:11:20,413 --> 00:11:23,281
No, thank you, your honor.
289
00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:25,616
Have you any more
Questions for this witness?
290
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:28,820
No, your honor. He's all yours.
291
00:11:28,889 --> 00:11:29,889
No questions.
292
00:11:29,923 --> 00:11:30,989
I have one...
293
00:11:31,057 --> 00:11:32,902
Am I still workin' for you?
294
00:11:32,926 --> 00:11:35,293
Step down.
295
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:41,966
Bailiff...
296
00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:44,235
Would you call
The next witness...
297
00:11:44,304 --> 00:11:46,171
Hank kimball?
298
00:11:46,239 --> 00:11:48,506
Hank kimball, please
Take the stand.
299
00:11:48,574 --> 00:11:50,775
Hank kimball.
300
00:11:52,946 --> 00:11:54,824
Is hank kimball in the court?
301
00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:56,881
Oh, that's me, your bailiff.
302
00:11:56,950 --> 00:11:58,216
Uh, your honor.
303
00:11:58,285 --> 00:11:59,728
Will you please come forward?
304
00:11:59,752 --> 00:12:00,785
Yes, sir.
305
00:12:02,522 --> 00:12:03,955
Oh, want a half
306
00:12:04,024 --> 00:12:05,890
Of a peanut butter
And jelly sandwich?
307
00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:07,837
Mr. Kimball, take the stand.
308
00:12:07,861 --> 00:12:08,861
Oh, yes, sir.
309
00:12:12,765 --> 00:12:13,898
Raise your right hand.
310
00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:16,701
Oh, it's full of peanut
Butter and jelly.
311
00:12:16,769 --> 00:12:18,169
Just raise it.
312
00:12:20,273 --> 00:12:21,784
Do you swear to tell the
Truth, the whole truth,
313
00:12:21,808 --> 00:12:23,441
And nothing but the truth?
314
00:12:23,509 --> 00:12:25,910
Well... Would you
Mind repeating that?
315
00:12:27,314 --> 00:12:29,113
Mr. Kimball.
316
00:12:29,182 --> 00:12:31,060
Your honor, I don't want
To swear to something
317
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:32,428
That I'm not sure
What I'm swearing to.
318
00:12:32,452 --> 00:12:37,021
All you're doing is
Swearing to tell the truth.
319
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:39,190
I always tell the truth.
320
00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:40,558
Well, not always.
321
00:12:40,626 --> 00:12:42,205
There was this one time
322
00:12:42,229 --> 00:12:43,739
When I came home
Late for dinner,
323
00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,074
And my mother asked me if...
324
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:47,698
Just say "I do"!
325
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,367
I do.
326
00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:51,970
Uh, mr. Kimball,
327
00:12:52,038 --> 00:12:54,239
You are a county agent?
328
00:12:54,307 --> 00:12:55,706
I do.
329
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,586
That ain't a proper answer.
330
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,710
Well, don't tell
Me. Tell the judge.
331
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:01,846
He told me to
Say "I do", and I did.
332
00:13:01,915 --> 00:13:03,514
That is, I did "I do."
333
00:13:04,851 --> 00:13:06,929
Mr. Kimball, as a county agent,
334
00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:09,131
It is your job to
Advise the farmers
335
00:13:09,155 --> 00:13:10,532
In this here locality
336
00:13:10,556 --> 00:13:13,157
On any farmin' problems.
337
00:13:13,226 --> 00:13:15,093
It is? Oh, heh.
338
00:13:15,161 --> 00:13:17,362
Yes, I guess you could say that.
339
00:13:17,430 --> 00:13:19,397
Oh, you did say that.
340
00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:21,799
Could you stick to
The pertinent facts?
341
00:13:21,868 --> 00:13:24,035
Yes, sir.
342
00:13:24,104 --> 00:13:26,004
What are they?
343
00:13:26,072 --> 00:13:27,683
Has mr. Douglas ever come to you
344
00:13:27,707 --> 00:13:29,018
With a farming problem?
345
00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:31,642
Objection. My problems
Are not relevant in this case.
346
00:13:31,711 --> 00:13:33,222
I beg to differ, your honor.
347
00:13:33,246 --> 00:13:35,124
What I am leadin' up
To is whether or not
348
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:37,228
You came to
Mr. Kimball to get advice
349
00:13:37,284 --> 00:13:39,750
On how to
Artificially induce rain.
350
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,252
I admit that I did.
351
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:43,321
Did what?
352
00:13:43,390 --> 00:13:45,623
Came to you.
353
00:13:45,691 --> 00:13:47,658
Oh, that.
354
00:13:47,727 --> 00:13:49,894
Yes, mr. Douglas
Came to me to find out
355
00:13:49,963 --> 00:13:51,740
If he could
Artificially induce rain,
356
00:13:51,764 --> 00:13:54,432
And I told him he could...
By seeding the clouds.
357
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:57,035
Was this method used?
358
00:13:57,103 --> 00:13:59,170
No, sir. Why not?
359
00:13:59,239 --> 00:14:02,040
Well, we had
Everything but the cloud.
360
00:14:02,108 --> 00:14:04,675
There was no cloud? No, sir.
361
00:14:04,744 --> 00:14:08,313
And without clouds,
There can be no rain.
362
00:14:08,381 --> 00:14:09,381
Well...
363
00:14:09,449 --> 00:14:13,952
And yet, my client mr. Haney
364
00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:17,021
Made it rain without clouds.
365
00:14:17,090 --> 00:14:18,289
Objection.
366
00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,036
It has not been proven
That he made it rain.
367
00:14:20,060 --> 00:14:21,870
We're gonna prove
That, your honor.
368
00:14:21,894 --> 00:14:23,761
Well, I wish you'd
Hurry up, diller.
369
00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:24,996
I'm gettin' hungry.
370
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:26,809
Well, why don't we
Go over to the saloon
371
00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:28,032
And have a sandwich?
372
00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:30,701
Court is recessed
For one hour for lunch.
373
00:14:36,242 --> 00:14:38,209
Mr. Haney...
374
00:14:38,278 --> 00:14:40,511
Now, I want you to tell the...
375
00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:43,448
You've got some mustard
On your chin, diller.
376
00:14:44,917 --> 00:14:48,086
I want you to tell the
Court in your own words
377
00:14:48,154 --> 00:14:52,390
The events leading
Up to this $350 lawsuit.
378
00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:54,225
And remember you're under oath.
379
00:14:54,294 --> 00:14:57,895
Mr. Douglas, that's
An unkind remark.
380
00:14:57,964 --> 00:14:59,897
In all of my dealings with you,
381
00:14:59,966 --> 00:15:02,666
Have you ever known
Me to be anything
382
00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:04,702
But the soul of honesty?
383
00:15:04,770 --> 00:15:07,005
As a matter of fact, I have.
384
00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:09,673
Well, that's not why we're here.
385
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:12,843
Now, concernin' this
Big drought-bustin' rain,
386
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:15,846
Which mr. Douglas
Contracted for,
387
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,448
But never paid for...
388
00:15:17,517 --> 00:15:18,749
Objection.
389
00:15:18,818 --> 00:15:20,084
Sustained.
390
00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:22,620
Would you let me run the court?
391
00:15:22,688 --> 00:15:24,766
I apologize, your honor.
392
00:15:24,790 --> 00:15:25,856
Very well.
393
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,436
Oh, you've got a little ketchup
394
00:15:27,460 --> 00:15:28,500
On your cheek.
395
00:15:30,296 --> 00:15:31,795
Well, sir,
396
00:15:31,864 --> 00:15:34,399
It was the 78th day
Of the drought,
397
00:15:34,467 --> 00:15:38,202
And mr. Douglas was
In a desperate mood.
398
00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:40,471
In fact, he had
A hari-kari knife
399
00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:41,605
In his hand.
400
00:15:41,674 --> 00:15:43,408
This not a hari-kari thing.
401
00:15:43,476 --> 00:15:45,443
I was just cutting
Some of the dead weeds.
402
00:15:45,512 --> 00:15:48,379
I noticed your
Corn as I drove in.
403
00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:50,726
Tsk, tsk, tsk. What
Happened to it?
404
00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:52,150
What happened?
405
00:15:52,218 --> 00:15:54,419
It hasn't rained for 78 days.
406
00:15:54,487 --> 00:15:55,819
Where?
407
00:15:55,888 --> 00:15:57,255
Here.
408
00:15:57,323 --> 00:16:00,224
You haven't had any rain here?
409
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:02,326
No, we haven't.
410
00:16:02,395 --> 00:16:05,396
It pour over at
My place last night.
411
00:16:05,465 --> 00:16:07,331
Oh, come on.
412
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:08,944
That's why I come over...
413
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:10,746
To borrow your life preserver
414
00:16:10,770 --> 00:16:12,036
For my wife.
415
00:16:12,105 --> 00:16:14,545
She's afraid to go
Down in the cellar.
416
00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:16,974
The water's over her head.
417
00:16:17,043 --> 00:16:19,477
How come it just
Rained at your place?
418
00:16:19,546 --> 00:16:21,045
Don't you know?
419
00:16:21,114 --> 00:16:23,247
Know what?
420
00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:25,816
I got a rainmakin' machine.
421
00:16:25,885 --> 00:16:29,337
Ohh! There isn't any such thing.
422
00:16:29,405 --> 00:16:30,421
How.
423
00:16:31,724 --> 00:16:33,536
Where's the, uh,
Rainmaking machine?
424
00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:36,694
You're lookin' at it.
Chief thundercloud.
425
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:40,198
The last of the
Great rainmakers.
426
00:16:40,266 --> 00:16:41,977
Ohh. You're not gonna get...
427
00:16:44,937 --> 00:16:47,472
Careful. Don't get him riled up,
428
00:16:47,540 --> 00:16:50,541
Or he'll float this farm
Right out of the state.
429
00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:53,311
Maybe out of country, too.
430
00:16:53,379 --> 00:16:57,948
Me make heap big
Water anytime I want.
431
00:17:01,387 --> 00:17:04,288
Not yet, chief. We
Haven't made a deal.
432
00:17:06,092 --> 00:17:08,292
And you're not going to.
433
00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:10,728
Mr. Douglas,
Before you say no...
434
00:17:10,796 --> 00:17:12,763
I've already said no.
435
00:17:12,832 --> 00:17:14,898
Uh, before you say it again,
436
00:17:14,967 --> 00:17:17,335
Let me ask you...
Are you familiar
437
00:17:17,403 --> 00:17:20,070
With the sayin',
"Dancing up a storm"?
438
00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:21,140
I am.
439
00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:23,307
Then let me show
You a few samples
440
00:17:23,376 --> 00:17:25,543
Of the chief's handiwork.
441
00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:28,546
Here is a specimen
442
00:17:28,615 --> 00:17:30,581
Collected from a cloudburst
443
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:34,519
Drummed up by the chief
In milltown, montana.
444
00:17:34,587 --> 00:17:39,390
For that, they make
Me honorary paleface.
445
00:17:39,459 --> 00:17:41,237
Say, that's quite an honor.
446
00:17:41,261 --> 00:17:44,162
You speak a big mouthful.
447
00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:47,765
And this is a 3-hour downpour
448
00:17:47,833 --> 00:17:49,500
Drummed up by the chief
449
00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:51,935
On the outskirts of modesto
450
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:55,573
While on his way to
A drought in kansas.
451
00:17:55,642 --> 00:17:58,376
Any kind of storm
You want, you name it,
452
00:17:58,444 --> 00:18:00,311
And the chief will produce it.
453
00:18:00,380 --> 00:18:03,514
For $100, he will
Make enough rain
454
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:05,249
To save all of your crops.
455
00:18:05,318 --> 00:18:08,819
And, as a special
Introductory offer,
456
00:18:08,888 --> 00:18:10,888
He'll throw in a rainbow
457
00:18:10,956 --> 00:18:12,690
At the end of the storm.
458
00:18:15,127 --> 00:18:16,394
Uh-huh.
459
00:18:16,462 --> 00:18:17,861
Out.
460
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:19,230
Out!
461
00:18:19,299 --> 00:18:21,732
Very well. But, mr. Douglas,
462
00:18:21,801 --> 00:18:23,401
In a couple of days,
463
00:18:23,469 --> 00:18:26,337
You'll come beggin'
To me on your knees.
464
00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:29,073
How.
465
00:18:29,141 --> 00:18:33,143
Mr. Douglas wasn't
Interested in your offer?
466
00:18:40,486 --> 00:18:43,854
Mr. Douglas wasn't
Interested in your offer?
467
00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,255
Not right then.
468
00:18:45,324 --> 00:18:47,036
But as the days passed,
469
00:18:47,060 --> 00:18:48,625
Things got worse.
470
00:18:48,695 --> 00:18:49,994
Creeks dried up,
471
00:18:50,063 --> 00:18:52,229
And the riverbeds didn't have
472
00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:54,009
A trickle of water in 'em.
473
00:18:54,033 --> 00:18:57,267
The reservoir was empty,
474
00:18:57,336 --> 00:18:59,870
And just as I predicted,
475
00:18:59,939 --> 00:19:02,173
Mr. Douglas came begging to me
476
00:19:02,241 --> 00:19:03,708
On his knees.
477
00:19:03,776 --> 00:19:05,509
Off your knees, mr. Douglas.
478
00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:07,011
You don't have to beg.
479
00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:10,314
I'm not begging. I'm
Fixing the tractor.
480
00:19:10,382 --> 00:19:12,049
Don't seem much point.
481
00:19:12,118 --> 00:19:13,884
Couple of more dry days,
482
00:19:13,953 --> 00:19:16,286
And there won't be
Nothin' left to tractor.
483
00:19:16,355 --> 00:19:19,090
It seems a shame,
When you could have
484
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:21,425
All the water you need danced up
485
00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:23,728
For a poultry $100.
486
00:19:23,796 --> 00:19:26,063
$150.
487
00:19:26,132 --> 00:19:27,810
Oh, the price has gone up.
488
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:30,567
The drier it gets, the
Harder he's gotta work.
489
00:19:30,636 --> 00:19:33,170
Look, I tell you what I'll do...
490
00:19:33,239 --> 00:19:35,740
I'll make you a
Sporting proposition.
491
00:19:35,808 --> 00:19:37,608
Double or nothing.
492
00:19:37,676 --> 00:19:39,977
If he makes it rain, $300.
493
00:19:40,046 --> 00:19:41,411
Nothing if he doesn't.
494
00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:43,013
350.
495
00:19:43,082 --> 00:19:44,648
350?!
496
00:19:44,717 --> 00:19:48,018
You no take advantage
Of introductory offer.
497
00:19:48,087 --> 00:19:50,788
Rainbow no longer free.
498
00:19:50,857 --> 00:19:53,057
All right. 350.
499
00:19:55,661 --> 00:19:57,728
Oh! Hold it! Hold it.
500
00:19:59,232 --> 00:20:01,398
We don't want you to get wet.
501
00:20:01,467 --> 00:20:03,934
There's no sense in
Ruining a good outfit.
502
00:20:04,003 --> 00:20:05,413
Thank you, thank you.
503
00:20:05,437 --> 00:20:09,206
Uh, that'll be 25
Cents rental fee.
504
00:20:09,275 --> 00:20:10,685
Twenty-fi...
505
00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:12,054
I'll take the chance.
506
00:20:12,078 --> 00:20:13,488
Come on, get on with it!
507
00:20:13,512 --> 00:20:14,512
Ok, chief.
508
00:20:23,455 --> 00:20:24,721
Any time now.
509
00:20:29,095 --> 00:20:30,360
Keep it up, chief.
510
00:20:30,429 --> 00:20:32,496
I think I felt a
Couple of drops.
511
00:20:43,876 --> 00:20:45,209
What did he say?
512
00:20:45,278 --> 00:20:46,777
Uh, he wants to know
513
00:20:46,846 --> 00:20:49,713
If he can have a glass of water.
514
00:20:49,782 --> 00:20:51,448
A gla...
515
00:20:51,517 --> 00:20:53,383
Out! Out! Mr. Douglas...
516
00:20:53,452 --> 00:20:55,986
Get out! And take
Sitting bull with you.
517
00:20:59,058 --> 00:21:01,258
He threw you and
The chief out, eh?
518
00:21:01,327 --> 00:21:02,426
Yes, sir.
519
00:21:02,494 --> 00:21:03,894
Your honor, I move
For a dismissal.
520
00:21:03,963 --> 00:21:05,329
We've heard the
Plaintiff testify
521
00:21:05,397 --> 00:21:08,165
That his so-called
Rainmaker failed to make rain.
522
00:21:08,234 --> 00:21:10,134
Diller, I'm afraid
Mr. Douglas is right.
523
00:21:10,203 --> 00:21:11,902
All you proved is...
524
00:21:11,971 --> 00:21:13,849
I have one more
Witness, your honor.
525
00:21:13,873 --> 00:21:16,740
Call chief thundercloud
To the stand.
526
00:21:16,809 --> 00:21:19,844
After mr. Douglas threw
You and mr. Haney out,
527
00:21:19,912 --> 00:21:21,111
What happened?
528
00:21:21,180 --> 00:21:23,881
Mr. Haney, he throw me out.
529
00:21:23,950 --> 00:21:25,850
Then what did you do?
530
00:21:25,918 --> 00:21:27,918
Me try to go back
To reservation,
531
00:21:27,987 --> 00:21:30,855
But because they make
Me honorary paleface
532
00:21:30,923 --> 00:21:32,923
In milltown, montana,
533
00:21:32,992 --> 00:21:35,860
Indians don't let me in.
534
00:21:35,928 --> 00:21:37,294
Where did you go then?
535
00:21:37,363 --> 00:21:39,663
Me can't getum job as rainmaker
536
00:21:39,732 --> 00:21:41,866
Because haney take my drum.
537
00:21:41,934 --> 00:21:43,800
So, me walk around,
538
00:21:43,870 --> 00:21:45,602
Look for job.
539
00:21:45,671 --> 00:21:48,772
Me come to house, knock on door,
540
00:21:48,841 --> 00:21:50,975
Pretty squaw come out.
541
00:21:51,043 --> 00:21:53,043
Hello, there. How.
542
00:21:53,112 --> 00:21:55,246
How? Oh, I'm mrs. Douglas.
543
00:21:55,314 --> 00:21:56,947
There's no how here.
544
00:21:57,016 --> 00:21:59,328
"How" indian word
For "Hello, there."
545
00:21:59,352 --> 00:22:00,885
Oh. How.
546
00:22:00,953 --> 00:22:02,987
Hello, there.
547
00:22:03,055 --> 00:22:04,688
What can I do for you?
548
00:22:04,757 --> 00:22:06,902
Me broke. Me needum job.
549
00:22:06,926 --> 00:22:08,993
Aww. Well, look around,
550
00:22:09,061 --> 00:22:10,995
And anything that
Needs doing, you do it.
551
00:22:11,063 --> 00:22:12,930
Me do good job.
552
00:22:17,870 --> 00:22:19,069
Who was that?
553
00:22:19,138 --> 00:22:20,704
An indian man.
554
00:22:20,773 --> 00:22:22,172
Did he have a drum?
555
00:22:22,241 --> 00:22:24,186
No, just a hat
Feather sticking in.
556
00:22:24,210 --> 00:22:26,310
Oh. What'd he want?
557
00:22:26,379 --> 00:22:28,390
He needed some
Work, so I told him
558
00:22:28,414 --> 00:22:30,192
To find something to do.
559
00:22:30,216 --> 00:22:31,315
Like what?
560
00:22:31,384 --> 00:22:33,017
I don't know.
561
00:22:36,055 --> 00:22:38,322
He, cut that out!
562
00:22:38,391 --> 00:22:39,957
Hey, what do you
Think you're doing?
563
00:22:40,026 --> 00:22:41,706
Don't you know there's
A water shortage on?
564
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:43,127
Me washum car.
565
00:22:43,195 --> 00:22:45,629
But you don't washum car
During a water shortage,
566
00:22:45,697 --> 00:22:47,697
You shilly shioux... Sioux!
567
00:22:53,272 --> 00:22:56,206
Lisa! Lisa!
568
00:22:56,275 --> 00:22:58,042
Lisa! It's raining!
569
00:22:58,110 --> 00:22:59,944
It's raining! Lisa!
570
00:23:05,952 --> 00:23:09,053
And as soon as you started
Chanting and dancing,
571
00:23:09,121 --> 00:23:10,720
It started to rain.
572
00:23:10,789 --> 00:23:13,490
You just not
Beatum your tom-tom.
573
00:23:13,559 --> 00:23:14,724
Step down.
574
00:23:14,793 --> 00:23:16,493
That's the plantiff's case.
575
00:23:18,297 --> 00:23:19,563
Mr. Douglas?
576
00:23:19,631 --> 00:23:22,799
Your honor, the plaintiff
Claims that it was because
577
00:23:22,868 --> 00:23:25,035
Of chief thundercloud's
Rain dance that it rained.
578
00:23:25,104 --> 00:23:27,071
I claim that it was the
Act of washing the car
579
00:23:27,139 --> 00:23:28,339
That caused it to rain.
580
00:23:28,407 --> 00:23:30,018
Everybody knows that the
Minute you wash your car,
581
00:23:30,042 --> 00:23:31,241
It rains!
582
00:23:31,310 --> 00:23:34,144
I think that $350
Is a little too much
583
00:23:34,213 --> 00:23:36,546
For me to pay to
Have my car washed.
584
00:23:36,615 --> 00:23:39,016
Mr. Douglas, are you claiming
585
00:23:39,085 --> 00:23:40,929
That washing your
Car made it rain?
586
00:23:40,953 --> 00:23:42,386
Well, not really, your honor,
587
00:23:42,455 --> 00:23:44,455
But it makes as much
Sense as a tired indian
588
00:23:44,523 --> 00:23:46,390
Beating a tom-tom.
589
00:23:46,459 --> 00:23:47,924
It certainly does.
590
00:23:47,994 --> 00:23:49,393
Case dismissed.
591
00:23:49,462 --> 00:23:52,729
Diller, save us a
Table at the saloon.
592
00:23:56,935 --> 00:23:59,970
Oh, good morning, rudolph.
593
00:24:00,039 --> 00:24:02,006
You don't say good
Morning to me?
594
00:24:02,074 --> 00:24:03,618
Oh, yes. Good morning.
595
00:24:03,642 --> 00:24:05,687
Rudolph, we have
Plenty of water now,
596
00:24:05,711 --> 00:24:07,722
So you can have all
You want to drink.
597
00:24:07,746 --> 00:24:09,480
Still watering rudolph, huh?
598
00:24:09,548 --> 00:24:11,293
Why not? He
Certainly deserves it
599
00:24:11,317 --> 00:24:13,295
After he made all that rain.
600
00:24:13,319 --> 00:24:14,885
Oh? He made it rain?
601
00:24:14,953 --> 00:24:16,931
Yes, don't you remember
When I told you?
602
00:24:16,955 --> 00:24:19,089
If you water a
Sunflower every day
603
00:24:19,158 --> 00:24:21,503
And you ask him nice
For water, he'll do it.
604
00:24:21,527 --> 00:24:23,260
So I watered him every day
605
00:24:23,329 --> 00:24:25,374
And asked him nice,
And he didded it.
606
00:24:25,398 --> 00:24:27,564
Uh-huh. When did you do that?
607
00:24:27,633 --> 00:24:29,677
When you were outside
Yelling at the indian
608
00:24:29,701 --> 00:24:30,967
For washing your car.
609
00:24:31,037 --> 00:24:32,269
Lisa, please.
610
00:24:32,338 --> 00:24:33,848
You don't believe it?
611
00:24:33,872 --> 00:24:36,018
A little water, please, rudolph,
612
00:24:36,042 --> 00:24:38,308
For the unbeliever.
613
00:24:39,978 --> 00:24:42,679
All right. Come on.
614
00:24:42,748 --> 00:24:44,048
Where is it?
615
00:24:47,986 --> 00:24:50,387
Eb, turn off that water!
616
00:24:50,456 --> 00:24:51,821
Talk to rudolph.
617
00:25:04,836 --> 00:25:07,804
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618
00:25:10,676 --> 00:25:13,677
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